Friday, September 7, 2012

Murphy Was Right

Murphy’s been sayin’ all along -- it ain’t the tobaccy, it’s the frigging filters and what-all gunk they stuff into the stuff.
Today on NPR (the ironically titled “Fresh Air”) they interviewed a researcher who, after decades of looking into the matter, concluded that filters do no good (“You can filter water, not smoke”) and some harm -- they can filter out the largest particles, “so that what is left just goes deeper into the lungs and is harder to detect and cure”. 

Now -- a plain untreated tobacco leaf, grows from the ground:  God made that.
A J.R. Reynolds or whomever  post-pesticide/chemical-fertilizer/marketing-driven-transmogrification-in-production packaged product:  Satan made that.  With the deliberate addition of things like cocoa and chocolate (now how about that), and the presumably undeliberate admixture of ----

… mousedroppings nosehairs bits of wire, blood of a variety of species, recycled Reddi-Whip ® and Twinkie-paste, plus spent uranium tailings and even (in one instance) an actual Higgs Boson (that put its finger to its lips and said, “Shhh!  They’re trying to find me!”)

So anyhow, check out the Murph-man --   he don’t lie.

And, for Murphy himself, telling you about his famous case (“Murphy on the Mount”),
simply click here:
-- Go on, click!  'Twon't hurt ye none!
 

No comments:

Post a Comment